The Fortuneteller of Charleston: A Continuing Exploration of Fortunosity, Fortuity, and Life


After a two-day voyage across the northern Bahamas and the Gulf Stream, where the winds were variously too strong and too weak and the seas were variously too steep and just right, we slid into Cape Canaveral, where after checking in with Customs, we had one of those classic, back-in-the-States restaurant experiences. We don.t know whether it was the bread, or the plethora of $3 gin and tonics the waitress kept bringing Chris, but all evening he kept exclaiming, .The bread alone, the bread alone makes this one of the best restaurants I.ve ever eaten at.. Anyway the rest of the food was very good too. And after a couple of days spent waiting out a cold front, we did another overnighter from Cape Canaveral to Charleston South Carolina, where we spent several days exploring that beautiful old city and visiting with Steve and Barbara, two good friends that we made this winter in the Bahamas. So here comes the real gist of this story.

Now, if, on a late evening in Charleston, we had perchance decided to employ the services of an old gypsy fortuneteller, perhaps with a crystal ball in a candlelit basement of some three hundred year-old house there, she might have produced the following foreseeings.

.Alas, I see the Maggie M with engine parts on her floor being towed into Georgetown, South Carolina by a big red boat that says Towboat US on the side of it. And looking further into the future, somehow I see the Maggie M stuck in a tree, and Chris looking about scratching his head in bewilderment. And then even further into the future, I see the Maggie M again stuck hard aground with Chris and Divya not looking ahead, but backwards chatting with other boaters as this strange collision with land occurs..

Now if this imaginary fortuneteller had produced these envisionings, she would not have been much in error. And if we had heard this fortune, we certainly would have never left Charleston. But fortunately for all concerned, we did, and now have an interesting tale to tell. So on the second day of serenely cruising up the old inter-coastal waterway we found ourselves aghast as smoke and the smell of a disintegrating fan belt told us something seriously unhappy was occurring in our engine room. After five minutes of both of us exclaiming to each other loudly our various thoughts about what to do next and where to go, we handily deployed the sails and managed to anchor the boat in a handy river several hundred yards from the waterway, which had been eerily populated with large tugboats and barges all that afternoon. After anchoring, we discovered the alternator had frozen up which meant our engine couldn.t run. For the next hour, Chris was beginning to make plans for spending the entire evening trying to uninstall the alternator and maybe install another one that we might have on board. During this time about every five minutes Divya kept saying, .Why don.t we call Towboat US? We bought insurance for unlimited free towing. They could bring us to the nearest town and we could fix the boat there.. Just as Chris was about to begin his all night project in the middle of nowhere, he had some sort of lapse which allowed him to consider that perhaps Divya was in fact right. We called Towboat US and within 30 minutes we were hitched up to a swift motorboat being towed along faster and quieter than we.d ever gone. It was sort of like sailing without having to worry about the sails. We enjoyed it so much, we tried to talk the guy into towing us all the way to the Chesapeake but he wasn.t sure that .unlimited. could be interpreted that loosely. As it turns out, we were towed to Georgetown where the people were very friendly and you could anchor within a hundred feet of many fine restaurants. Chris installed the new alternator the next morning while Divya when shopping and got a nice hair cut which she so much preferred over having her kitchen and living room turned into a workshop populated by a cussing mechanic. The cussing mechanic was also happy to be able to cuss at will and not worry about messing up his wife.s nice kitchen. So as it turns out within two days the engine was happily purring again and we were off on the calm and gentle waterways of South Carolina. We had a wonderful day. The waterways in South Carolina are actually on little rivers and creeks and you feel amazed that your seagoing boat is now on a Huck Finn sort of journey through the woods with wonderful Spring smells and bird sounds. Well, it was all wonderful until Divya came down with an extreme episode of heartburn. Chris was periodically locking the steering and going down below to make Divya more Alka Seltzer. At one point during his attentions to her, she remarked, .Shouldn.t you be checking on the course of the boat?. Chris replied, .Nah, it.s fine.. But out of the corner of his eye started noticing tree branches gently caressing the port lights of the boat. He dashed up out of the hatch, threw the shifter into reverse at full throttle, but not before the Maggie M came to a sudden and determined halt. Well when Chris turned around, he discovered the bow of the Maggie M jammed perfectly in between two small trees on the shore of our beautiful river. No amount of reverse seemed to have any effect upon the loving caress these two trees were giving our boat. The tide was falling and the thought of our boat being an interesting topic of conversation for inter-coastal travelers for years to come began to seem like it was not altogether out of the question. One the other hand we could have called Towboat US again, but it would have been awfully humiliating for the master sailors we sometimes entertain ourselves to be. Luckily at this point, Chris spied a handsome and sturdy tree not too far off of our stern. Deploying himself rope in hand in our dinghy, he set about making various fastenings that totally bewildered Divya. He then climbed back in the boat and began cranking the old winch and applying bursts of reverse. Lo and behold, the embracing trees slowly let go as the Maggie M extracted herself from their grasp. After collecting the various ropes and dinghies, and Chris, the Maggie M set forth once again. For the rest of that day Chris kept saying, .Of all the things I.ve envisioned, I never thought we.d be stuck in a tree..

Well you.d think after this experience of not paying attention to the general direction and speed of our craft, we would be all the more adept in the future. We.ll you.d think this, and we thought this, but thinking it doesn.t actually make it happen. The next day, as we were slowly circling with some other boats waiting for a bridge to open, we started talking with the crew of one of the other boats, and ran smack into the side of the waterway just as the bridge was opening. The other boats waved goodbye making a mad dash for the bridge while we were left lodged firmly on the bank, once again unable to extract ourselves from it.s grasp. Well Divya never mentioned Towboat US but you can be sure we were both thinking of it again. Chris took out a long boat hook and after fifty or so soundings, determined that indeed the draft of our boat exceeded the depth of the water around us. We gave the reverse thrusters another shot about 10 minutes later and miraculously we backed off. Divya would like to point out that it really wasn.t miraculous. The tide was rising at the time.

Well, this explains the strange visions that our fortuneteller might have had. What lies in store for us further ahead, we hesitate slightly to think about, but know that however bizarrely events might come to pass, we seem to have the ability to survive them and hopefully will.

Right now we are anchored in a small and calm bay somewhere in Southern North Carolina about to eat some frozen shrimp that we bought in the Bahamas but according to the label, was shipped there from Thailand by Sam.s of Arizona. And we must agree with a voice that we just now heard on the VHF radio from another broke down sailor being towed by Boat US, .Well, Towboat captain, life could be worse. It.s a beautiful sunset..